The Lord always provides the solution even before the moment it is needed. And often afterwards, as well, just for confirmation.
After getting the letter yesterday about Arena's demise, last night's message was on suffering for blessing and as a part of spiritual growth. Perfect. Especially since after a disappointment like that the tendancy is to start trying to affix blame, either on others or on self. But the fact is, God is on his throne, he numbers the hairs on my head and His sovereignty rules over all. Nothing happens in my life that He does not approve, and if I believe that promotion comes from Him and him alone, with no merit on my part, then I must also believe that demotion, such as it is, comes at His hand as well. And be content with it.
I think I am. One of the things I've been praying for is that He would deliver me from being in bondage to what people think, and to the world's system that says success and personal worth is a matter of your accomplishments and sales and how many people like you or like what you do.
Do I seek the favor of men or of God? When you have things like this taken from you, it tests that belief. Are you going to freak out and fall apart because not enough people liked what you did (it would appear) or will you recognize that it's not an accident, it's a part of the plan and the plan is perfect. More than perfect, it is specifically designed with your best interests in mind. If I'm writing for God, sales can't really matter. He's in charge of them. He gives enough or he doesn't, but it's not my concern. My concern is to write the books and leave the rest to Him.
He provided for me in more than just last night's message, too, because in the conference last weekend, the last part of Gideon's story was all about numbers. All about how God doesn't need numbers. And one of the things Pastor McLaughlin said was, "God will place us in situations where the odds are overwhelmingly against us, so we will know that we are not the ones doing the delivering, He is. It's not us, it's not anything about us and it's not with the help of other people, either. It's all Him."
So. We'll just see what He's going to do, because I really believe He's going to do something cool. I just don't know what it is yet. Kind of like Christmas, I guess... all those packages and you know you're going to like what's in them, you just have NO idea what it is. But I know the one I serve, and that is everything.
Karen