Tuesday, September 23, 2008

On Getting out of God's Way

Quigley's latest ailment and what's going on in writing have come together to strengthen some understanding I'm gaining about what it means to get out of God's way (which I mentioned in an earlier post, His Order and Timing) . In giving Quigley's situation over to God first, but also -- in the physical realm -- to my husband to handle, it's occurred to me that once you are no longer the one having to make the decisions, you don't have to do the assessments of what is going on. I don't have to answer why his stool is a certain way and what is the best way to deal with it. I don't really have to think about it at all, since it's not my problem.

Neither do I have to think about the big picture, what is actually happening now in his intestine, what might happen tomorrow, what needs to be done about it, etc, etc, because I don't have to make any decisions. In the case of Quigley, as I said, I've given his situation over to my husband to decide. In the case of the book, it's a little harder to see because it seems like I am the one making the decisions. There's no one else in this office but me, so...

And yet, when I start thinking I have to make the decisions about it, do something, figure something out, I get overwhelmed. I can't make them. I've asked God exactly this question (How do I get out of your way in this?), and I believe that over the last few days He's answered me . Here are my conclusions relative to how that works with writing:

How Do I Get Out of God's Way?

1. Stop demanding or even trying to solve the problem.

2. Stop trying to figure out what the problem is.

3. Relax and let Him provide answers in His order and timing.

4. Read through the text & make whatever changes occur to me.

5. If nothing occurs, that's fine, too.

6. Remember this is supposed to be fun: a privilege and a form of play.

It's working. I applied all of that today, and have a bunch of ideas for chapter 10 and 15 pages of text to work with. The Unity Meeting that formerly had nothing to do with Cam and his next scene, now has everything to do with him. In fact, I switched it from Lacey's pov to his. So now I can do some things with her, as seen through his eyes, that I couldn't do before. I'm jazzed.

Oh, and how's Quigley doing? I have no idea. He's eating a lot of rice and chicken, is acting fairly normal and energetic, there were no dark stools today (so far) but there was one very runny one this evening, despite three doses of Pepto Bismol.

It is so freeing not to have to figure out what any of that means, or what I need to do, just to remember that God's got His hand on it all, He knows what needs to be done, what is going on, and He will take care of all of it.